STPM woes

  Got my monthly test results earlier today, had to pass it to guardians to sign. 2.75 CGPA not including MUET(english) which I got 89 marks = Band 6. Studied pretty hard for monthly test and the only thing I can say is that I actually did my best already. Studied biology so hard and I almost failed because teacher made the paper according to one sub topic which I apparently was just so LUCKY to NOT study due to time restrictions. Just my luck. Next was Chemistry, I understood revised consistently for it as well. But the thing is.. understanding and applying are totally different things.
TOTALLY DIFFERENT OKAY!

   Pengajian am aka general studies, I only revised a couple of times a week and managed to get A-. But I suppose I was lucky there wasn't essay for this test else I'd be doomed. Mathematics T? no comment. The darn thing is too overwhelming for me, I had to give my tutor a distress call and even he was astounded by the compact-ness of the new syllabus. Its just too overwhelming. Teacher doesn't even stop to revise because of the time restriction.

 I can only say that I feel like crap right now.

   I looked through the matriculation text books while in the bookstore and was pretty bothered by the vast difference between our syllabus. It probably fueled my dread even more to think that we STPM students are competing against Matriculation students who obviously have it so much more easier syllabus wise, for placement in university. One look at their Biology Chapter 1 and I could easily point out all the details and diagrams that weren't there, how detailed our syllabus is compared to theirs. Is it fair? Perhaps on some level since they don't get to go back to the comforts of their homes. But honestly? I don't think that is such a big deal. Being able to live alone comes down to your level of independence and level of maturity. 

  I've read all available informations about matriculation before I got rejected from it, after enrolling into form 6 and being able to compare between the two. I've become somewhat disheartened of my chances against them. Our co-curriculum grading system is totally different. It takes so much effort to score 10 whole points here and in matriculation.. competition between campus is counted as national level if not mistaken.

  All in all,  When something goes wrong, you have three choices. Let it break you, Let it define you or Let it make you stronger. Take your pick. As +kellyclarkson's song go.. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger :') 

Note** sources are from my own views as a form 6 student going through it and after reviewing lots of blogs written by matriculation students. I even emailed them personally before. Understand before you judge, this is my point of view.